I applied for another job today. I keep doing that in the hope that I will indeed get a job. Everyone tells me that I should just relax and be "retired". I should work on my business and take the unemployment. So why can't I do that? I really wish I knew. I wake up every morning, look at the clock and figure out where my daughter is. On her way to school? At school? How are her classes going? Why does she have a job and I don't? Does this mean she is a better teacher than I am?

I even saw a job I am qualified for at her school. I am not going to apply for it. I worked in the same building as she did and even worked with her once. It was very strange. I don't want to put either of us in that position again. At this point I really am torn as to what to do.